Euro-English

Pizdzius · 09-11-2008, 01:05 PM

English in Europe

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English.'

In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w'with 'v'.

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united Urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

-Edge- · 09-11-2008, 01:07 PM

Hahaha great joke! Did you come up with that one yourself

?

Pizdzius · 09-11-2008, 01:10 PM

Nah, got it forwarded but it's so exquisite I just had to spread it here

Envy · 09-11-2008, 01:11 PM

Haha! That's fantastic

-Edge- · 09-11-2008, 01:13 PM

its hilarious, I sent it to all my E-Mail contacts

phoenix_jackson · 09-11-2008, 02:11 PM

OMG this is soo freaking funny.

A little reply. It was an ad but I can't find the vid:

"Hello, zis is German Coast Guard"
"We're sinking. I repeat, WE ARE SINKING!"
"W-what are you zinking about?"

Leg_The_Marks · 09-11-2008, 02:39 PM

OMFG!!!

ALI G won!!!

Pizdzius · 09-11-2008, 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by phoenix_jackson

OMG this is soo freaking funny.

A little reply. It was an ad but I can't find the vid:

"Hello, zis is German Coast Guard"
"We're sinking. I repeat, WE ARE SINKING!"
"W-what are you zinking about?"

hahah

awesome

Static_Fang · 09-11-2008, 03:12 PM

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Way to go, these things are always great!

Mattdoesrock · 09-11-2008, 04:29 PM

Hahaha! Brilliant ^^

09-11-2008, 01:05 PM	#1
Pizdzius Baron Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Polish Side of RA Posts: 779	Euro-English English in Europe The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English.' In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w'with 'v'. During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united Urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas. __________________ Pizdzius Swedzioszek Leader of CBA Regnum Comic <- my Regnum Comic , RSS version -> RSS (if you wish to contact me on my other realm character: Ignis - Josephine)

09-11-2008, 01:10 PM	#3
Pizdzius Baron Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Polish Side of RA Posts: 779	Nah, got it forwarded but it's so exquisite I just had to spread it here __________________ Pizdzius Swedzioszek Leader of CBA Regnum Comic <- my Regnum Comic , RSS version -> RSS (if you wish to contact me on my other realm character: Ignis - Josephine)

09-11-2008, 01:11 PM	#4
Envy Master Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 400	Haha! That's fantastic __________________ Pride Greed Gluttony Wrath Envy Lust Sloth There's no such thing as innocence, only degrees of guilt. Immortal Legends / Frozen Flame

09-11-2008, 02:11 PM	#6
phoenix_jackson Initiate Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: South Korea Posts: 150	OMG this is soo freaking funny. A little reply. It was an ad but I can't find the vid: "Hello, zis is German Coast Guard" "We're sinking. I repeat, WE ARE SINKING!" "W-what are you zinking about?" __________________ ONETTE Warlock of Syrtis Herbred Knight of The White Company

09-11-2008, 02:39 PM	#7
Leg_The_Marks Apprentice Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: romania Posts: 59	OMFG!!! ALI G won!!! __________________ Have no fear, Leg is here!!!

09-11-2008, 01:07 PM	#2
-Edge- Banned Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Łódż, Poland Posts: 1,506	Hahaha great joke! Did you come up with that one yourself ?

09-11-2008, 01:13 PM	#5
-Edge- Banned Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Łódż, Poland Posts: 1,506	its hilarious, I sent it to all my E-Mail contacts

09-11-2008, 03:12 PM	#9
Static_Fang Master Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Australia Posts: 310	Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahaha Way to go, these things are always great! __________________ Dark Venom Fang Spider Warlock

09-11-2008, 04:29 PM	#10
Mattdoesrock Count Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: England, UK. Posts: 1,055	Hahaha! Brilliant ^^ __________________ MattdoesJOKE_#40_NOT_FOUND RA / Hor... Haven?